Common Courtesy, Voice-Mail, and the Return Call

I was walking through the Library with a friend the other day, and we realized something amazing: In a country/society that is becoming increasingly overrun by the Ugg-boot-wearing loud cell-phone talking youths and the Get-Out-of-My-Way-I'm-Shopping mall-crawling bastards, people still respect the library. So odd to be in a busy building, and see signs that say "No Cellphones" and watch people turn them off. It points out that we still have a chance to stop the slide down the slope towards a Harlan Ellison short story. "If This Goes On..."

I remember when I would run into the store to pick up a bag of dog food, and the people with the full basket would let me go ahead of them, because "You only have the one thing." I still do this. But most of the time, nowadays, approaching the checkout stand feels like "Joust," and I'm not cut-throat enough to knock those knights off of their flying ostriches. I get on the city bus, and see the elderly man, standing in front of a row of people in the "Please Vacate These Seats for the Elderly." Doors slam in our faces, parking places get stolen, Baristas are stepped on so some loser can for a brief moment feel superior, the spiral of negativity flies out of control. Horns honk, profanity is yelled out loud around young children, "May I please" becomes "I want." The worst part is that it's always one small thing. No giant leap into the maw, just a nip here, nip there.

The most recent victim of this trend is phone etiquette. Today, I got a call from a number I didn't recognize. They left the following message: "I'm sorry, I dialed the wrong number." This made my day. This was a person who knew that nobody leaves messages anymore, so they would probably be able to expect the following phone call from me: "Hi, someone just called me from there?" When did it become okay not to leave a message? Why has a whole dialogue developed for returning a phone call? I don't want to call you back if you were just calling to say "Hi!" Leave me a message that says "Hi!" and we'll both be happy. Or hey, text me! Either way, it saves us a lot of time on the "Hey you called?" "I did? oh, that's right." "So What's up?" "Nothing." GAAAAAA!! Give me back my life!

And then there's the return phone call. I don't mean when I leave you a message. Believe me, I understand, if we are friends, that life can interfere. I'm talking about the 22 interiews I've had for various jobs. Every single one ended with "Great, we'll contact you in the next few days with next steps. If you have any questions, feel free to call me." Every single one: NO WORD. Now, please understand, these were companies that were considering me because they want to "improve customer service." Hey, here's free idea number one: If I call and check in, return my call. I'd rather hear "We're moving forward with other applicants" than be in limbo, unsure if I should plan that vacation, because hey, what if I need to start working? It's courtesy. That's why "Customer Service" used to be called "Courtesy Service." Wondering why your company is struggling? You have not learned to see everyone as a potential customer.

Maybe you should all study the library. The one in Downtown Seattle is beautiful.